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Playing Barbie with Chris the Fish

by on July 26, 2013

Hello you fabulous Readers! Its me, your favorite fishie, Chris. Still don’t remember? Well sheesh, I guess I haven’t left a lasting impression. Hmmm, I’m the one who constantly complains about Lori and her tendencies to make me want to rip my hair out. Yep. THAT fishie.

*mutters to self over her lack of importance*

Anyway, I promised I would share a funny tale with you guys. One that will for sure cause me heckling and being poked at for awhile, but I’m ok with that. You see, sometimes as a best friend, and Beta-assistant to the ever important Alpha (*note from Lori-Chris shouldn’t let me do her editing or I improvise)…I do things…that…umm…how to put this…sometimes I do things that cause myself much embarrassment. All for the sake of making Lori’s books the best they can be. I don’t know about Lisa and the other gals, but I have a way of not just sticking both feet into the…er…mud, and I usually provide visuals as well. Just wait and see. (and before you ask.. NO there are NOT pictures of this..I hope…)

Last week while doing the fishie      thing,      I had all kinds of issues. I couldn’t figure out if my brain just      wasn’t registering. Or if the words really were unclear, or heck,      if I needed to drink more for it to all make sense.. In any case I      gave up and called a skype meeting with the Alpha of the crew.      Speaking of which, we find skype to be VERY useful in discussing      things. Hands free, interrupting each other constantly. But above      all      theres a VISUAL aspect. Sigh.. (hey I have to gear up for my      embarrassment here)

So as I was saying, Lori and I were on Skype discussing one of her latest creations-sorry no secrets on this one, its not remotely done yet-and a particular scene had me scratching my head. I took my computer back to my room, get myself cozy on my bed for what I know will be a long discussion.

Me- Lori, I love you and all, but uhh…I need some clarification. I’m not sure exactly HOW he can reach these areas if she is laying across the bed. A butt plug wouldn’t go in very easily at that angle.

Lori- Yes it would, she’s standing.

Me- Standing? Uhh..really?

Lori- Yes she is standing go back to page XXX.

*scrolls through and finds what she’s talking about*

Me- Ok I see that part,  but it still doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t sound comfortable.

Lori- See how I have her standing at the foot of the bed?

Me- But the foot board would hurt shoved into her stomach like that, and a butt plug would be hard to put in when she’s standing unless she is bending over a bit. But I seriously don’t think she can bend that much there and still be tied up.

*meanwhile we have Lisa on Facebook chatting about the same scene*

Lisa- How did he reach her with the egg if she was on her stomach?

Lori- Well I guess Lisa thought the  same thing. Lisa, she’s not laying down she is standing.

Lisa- Really? Did you tell us she was standing?

Lori- Ugh, page XXX. I just briefly mentioned it, but I guess I need to be more clear.

Me- Hey how big is the bed? I’m assuming since he’s a big ol dude, its not a small bed. See this is a queen bed, and I’m tall. She’s short and see arm to arm….

(yeah.. here it goes)

Lori- *choking on laughter* What are you doing? *Snort*  YAY! I can use you to act out my positions!

*Shes watching me as I spread across my bed showing how impossible something would be for a short girl on a very large bed and how much worse it would be standing up versus lying down*

Me- Oh shut up and just look. Maybe if you add…

Lori- *still laughing* That is just awesome, do it again. Oh my God Lisa, I wish you could see this. Chris is role playing for me!

Me- Damn it Lori! Are you listening?

Lori- You’re better than Ballerina Barbie! Could you just kneel right there to see if it would work?

Me- ARGH! No I will not, are you going to change it? Hey, answer me!

*nope she cant say anything because she’s still laughing*

After all this was said and done, I may ban her from video skyping me.  I’m way to animated, and she’s just trying to get me in bed again. I have to say it was the first time I’ve ever been laughed at when trying to situate a sexual position.

~The now embarrassed fishie

From → Blog Roll

  1. Cherie Clark permalink

    I love you Fishie Dear. I think you are amazing for taking it on the chin to entertain us.

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